When your child exceeds you

When I was in high school I played football. I would say I was not so good at it. I played the line and my entire technique involved hitting whoever happened to be in front of me. I rarely actually knew the play nor understood what was going on around me.

I went to a small church school that had about 300 students and our football coach was also the priest for the school. He tried his best but there was only minor talent and he really had no idea how to coach. So we regularly lost and when I finished high school I never played again.

Which brings me to my son. He attends a church school also. But his school has 2500 students. And a football team that USA Today has ranked #3 in the nation. Their entire coaching staff is ex-NFL, the Varsity is sponsored by Nike and two of their games this season were televised nationally on ESPN. To them football is deadly serious. Last year the entire starting line had a football scholarship to a major college.

They learn techniques that most players never see until college. Where I used to just hit the guy in front of me, they study footwork and leverage points. They understand deeply the technique behind the game at a level that no one on my team ever approached. They also practice 6 days a week and off season their days start with a 6 AM morning workout.

This year my son played JV. For the 5th year in a row they were undefeated. The offensive line averages around 250 lbs. One team refused to play against them because in the prior game 6 of the opposing players had to be carried off the field. During that game I heard on team mom mention to another that "we are going to need more ambulances". And in this highly competitive mix, my son was selected out of 60 kids to move up to Varsity in his sophomore year.

Which brings me to the title of this post. For the first time, one of my children is clearly better at something that I could ever be. Even if he never plays college level he is still a better football player than I ever was. Which is sort of a funny feeling. It is like the time when they finally beat you in a footrace even though you are trying (instead of letting them win).

I find myself un-bothered though. I am fiercely proud of all my kids and very proud of my oldest son. To know that he is better than me actually makes me happy in a strange way.

What I do worry about is if in my pride I am putting an expectation on him that he cannot live up to. At the skill level he is playing at kids are thinking college ball and beyond. There is always the temptation to use performance enhancing drugs to stay ahead. I worry constantly that he will be pushed into something stupid. Especially since at "only"220 lbs (at 15!) he is considered "small" for the position he is playing.

So I encourage him to play while constantly cautioning him against drugs and reassuring him that even if he does not play college he will still have had the experience of playing with people who he will eventually see on TV in the NFL. And that experience alone is worth something! He will always know that he got selected for Varsity as a sophomore and was a success in a very difficult team. I hope that is enough. For me I could not be more proud of him and I don't care if he plays college or not. I just hope he believes me.

In South Florida we have Lobster Mini-Season. For 2 days in at the end of July you can go out and catch lobster (up to 6 each person). Regular season starts in August. It is sort of insanity. It has become this huge deal where it seems like half of South Florida (I may be exaggerating there) loads up on boats and hunts lobster. What makes it really funny is that many of them have no idea what they are doing.

This year three of us at work decided to go lobster hunting with our sons. So the six of us loaded up on my buddy's boat and headed out. I was inexperienced but my two friends were veterans.

Each morning we met at my friend's house and loaded into his truck. We then headed to a private dock we have access to (public docs are overcrowded on this day and take forever). We launched out by 6 AM and hit the water.

Day 1: We get out into Miami bay and the boat motor refuses to work. After about 2 hours of back and forth calls with my friend's boat mechanic we finally get it running and head out to the Keys. We hunted lobster until 5 PM that night. I was waxed. C1 was with me and that is as tired as I have ever seen him. We caught only two lobsters we were allowed to keep. No problem catching lobsters, big problem catching big lobster. We did manage to stag one huge 17 incher and one smaller one. It was a cool experience though even without the lobster. We had a barracuda swim right by us (mean looking fish), had a wild dolphin play around us as we swam, and saw a lion fish (highly poisonous fish). We stayed way away from the lion fish. It is supposed to be like being stung by a hundred bees at once. No thanks! C1 got stung by a jelly fish though which he suffered through surprisingly quietly.

Day 2: Better luck with the boat so we got out earlier. We decided to dive some reefs fairly far out. All the dads SCUBA dove and the sons floated on the surface looking for lobster. Again, caught 15-20 but had to throw all of them back. I did see this huge black spotted eel though. It looked and me and I swam backwards fast!

As my buddy and I were complaining about the lack of sizable lobsters I suddenly realized that people pay good money just to come here and dive these reefs. And here I have them in my back yard and I am complaining. So I finished the dive and just enjoyed several beautiful reefs. What was neat was that you just drive around the Keys and look for reefs. Once you fins one you drop anchor and dive in. Most of the reefs had no one else even close to us when we dove.

At the end the dads decided this is a new tradition. We are going to try and go next year also. Maybe we will have better luck. I know we will have just as much fun!

Lazy Summer days in South Florida

Well we just got back from our annual trip to Cocoa beach. I really love it there. Every day is so completely lazy. I don't wake up until 9 (which is unheard of, usually I am up before the sun). Then we either spend the day swimming or going to the beach. This year we also spent hours into the playroom where A and the RP lived. We stay at the Ron Jon Cape Caribe (you can look it up on the internet..awesome place).

So now we are back and yes you guessed it, back in the water! It is so hot that usually on the weekend we live in the pool. Then I cook dinner on the grill and we eat outside. The wonderful thing about living in the sub-tropics is that after the sun start setting the world cools down. So you have these wonderful evening breezes. We sit out by the pool and eat our dinner and it is super!

Other than that, not much going on. Still no hurricanes which is great! In other news, C1 is now driving confidently. We invested in a set of driving lessons for him and it has really paid off. He is confidently driving around. We picked up the Matriarch from her hotel recently and he drove her around! That was her first grandchild who could drive. So a great first! She survived the trip with only minor gasps and wimpers!

Oh yeah that is a rare picture of me (I am usually the one taking pictures) with the RP. I was trying to steal a kiss and she was having none of it. I have now officially gone on a diet after that picture. Time to get back to my fighting weight (though the shirt is sort of puffing out).

I have no camera and thus no fun pictures..I blame the dog

So I have lost my camera. That means no cool pics for the blog this week. Somewhere there is a red camera in my house. I am a bit skeptical about finding it. Last time I lost my Ipod I never found it. I think it is possible that my lab ate it. He eats everything else so it seems possible!

In the winter I always enjoy talking to my friends who do not live in the sub-tropics. As they freeze we still stroll around in short. It is hot now but in a tropical kind of way. So burning hot but a cool breeze. By evening it is still hot but you can sit outside and it is pleasant. These days though we pretty much spend 60% of our time in the pool trying to keep cool.

The family is leaving for Cocoa Beach tomorrow. In 2007 I bought a timeshare and I have never looked back. Each year I take my family for a week there and we love it. Everyone always warned me about timeshares but really this one works fine for me. Since I really don't have a big desire to go anywhere but the property I bought into I have never had a problem reserving the week I want.

During much of my childhood my family spent a week each summer at the beach. Now I have recreated that only in Cocoa! It is funny how you end up picking certain memories from your childhood and relive them with your family.

Anyway I just wanted to document something!

Pirate Party

Today we went to a pirate party. As I have said before, it always amazes me how a 4-5 year old birthday party has not changed one bit since I started going to them 10 years ago with C1.

The party was actually a lot of fun. It was at a local park. They had a lady come in who was the entertainer. She dressed like a pirate and the party began with face painting. Then we had a series of games. They included a treasure hunt, races, dancing, etc. The kids had a blast! At the end A told the birthday boy "this was the best party ever".

It is sort of funny since we have been to far more expensive birthday parties where A did not enjoy himself half as much. This was sort of a party distilled to what was really important...playing with your friends. I have going to have to think about that when A's birthday comes up this summer. Maybe having fun is more important that some elaborate setup!

Another note is the playground itself. If you look in the background of the first picture you can see the playscape. All the playscapes here in my part of South Florida look like this. We have a merciless searing sun during the summer. But always a cool breeze off the ocean. That means that under shade even in the height of the summer it is at least bearable. So all the playscapes have huge tents over them to provide shade. I have been to a couple of playscapes without a shade and they are essentially unusable after April and before October-November. With the shade you can play all year.

Daddy I need a doctor

And so begins the dreaded sick time! A started coughing about 4 days ago. We took him to the doctor after it became obvious that he was not kicking it in a day. Now suddenly the RP is coughing and has a 100 degree fever.

I get way more worried about the RP than A. Like all my boys, A is a bruiser. He was born at 10 pounds and now at 4 is weighing in at a petite 45 pounds. So when he gets sick I worry like any parent but in the back of my mind is the fact that, like all the males in this family, he can take a licking and keep on ticking (showing my age there, not sure how many people under 40 would recognize that reference).

The RP ,on the other hand, is a different kettle of fish altogether. She is still only 25 pounds. You don't really notice it when she is healthy because she is always running around with her brother. She eats like a horse but never gains weight. She has one of those Russian model bodies that is thin without being skinny. However, once she is sick is becomes obvious all of a sudden. She is this wet little puppy dog who needs to be carried around all the time. At least she ate something tonight so hopefully that will help.

I think tomorrow we are doctor bound. Unless I see a fever break we are going to have to brave the doctor's office tomorrow for Saturday clinic. Thank God for a solid insurance plan, a calm daughter and a Kindle. I think all that together will let me survive the 2-3 hours that is going t0 consume tomorrow.

No beach for us! I just hope it stays away from C1 and C2.

Lost Focus

Well I sort of lost focus on the blog recently. The Wife decided she needed a taste of Texas and took a week trip with the RP to Texas. Which left me as the single father of 3 boys. We survived fine. I will say that the house would be a lot more structured if it was just me. My wife is the creative, spontaneous one. I like structure and order. So while she was gone we hit our routine on Day 2 and there we stayed for the entire week!

This week I am dealing with hurricane planning. In South Florida hurricanes are a big deal. At my company we have an entire week of hurricane planning. Basically for the week we simulate what would happen if a bad hurricane was bearing down on Miami. So you have calls every hour, checklists to be filled out, plans to be reviewed and rewritten. It is incredibly busy. The first year I did it I sort of had a hard time getting into it. I approached it only quasi seriously. But I am surrounded by people who have survived hurricane after hurricane. And they are serious as a heart attack about the drills. This year I am really getting into it. You have to imagine what you would do if the hurricane was really bearing down on the city.

I work for a utility so we are last out and first in. We are the #1 restoration utility in the world. Of course I always have to follow that statement with..because we have a lot of practice! Once the storm is coming our job is to make sure that we weather the storm and then get power back on as quickly as possible. That is a intense job that takes everyone in the company focused. You actually have two jobs, a storm job and a non-storm job.

Here is a sign of what a great company I work for. If you are out of town when a hurricane is coming they send a crew to your house to help your family prepare for the storm. I think that is cool. It would never have occurred to my old employer to do something like that. I was in Ireland on business once and a hurricane was bearing down on our town. Never heard a peep from them.

Anyway, enough gripping. I just wanted to get something out on the blog!